Requiem For A Trend

former music bloggers

Well, looks like blogger might be the new internet-ghetto. Many of the people that inspired me to join in on this whole music sharing/festival of verbal onanism have gone on to newer, greener pastures like podcasts, tumblr porn, twit(ter), and other short attention span pandering suck&fuckeries. Posts have been sporadic or non-existent in many of my favorite internet haunts. I get it. I'm part of the problem. Hell, I'm almost too lazy to even embed links in this post. At one point the constant flood of music I was DLing became overwhelming. I just couldn't find the time to listen to all the sick shit people were posting. I still have albums on my HD that I've never listened to. As a silly man once didn't say, "There's more to life than blogs you know, but not much more." Well, I, for one, always enjoyed the flogging of a dead horse (or a dead hooker), so here I am posting without shame. To all those guys who created and contributed to the blogs over there on the right, thanks for all the good times and awesome tunes. I will continue to haunt these pages, and I will never leave you, until I do. For all the people that have sacrificed their time to read my bullshit, and to those who choose to communicate via comments and e-mails, here's a truly heartfelt "Thank you." Also, I'm really stoked to see Jason and Shelby out here on the Big Island real soon. You guys are champions.


And, speaking of champions, here is a truly majestic piece of work by the much-celebrated paragons of getting fucked-up and fucking things up: HICKEY's "US vs. THEM" e.p.  Matty Luv is dead, yeah, but HICKEY is immortal. Ain't nothing in this world makes me happy like a HICKEY record. Matty's mad poetry and  gonzo guitar attack and Aesop's nitro-fueled jalopy pump n' munch drums have inspired many a drunken night's regret-worthy hi-jinx. Great alone or with friends. When is somebody gonna write the book on HICKEY, already? Few bands have ever earned such a wild and debauched (not to mention dumb and crazy) reputation. Aesop said it best, "Hickey is a cult band. When they were around, nobody went to  their shows. Now, everybody says they were there." LONG LIVE THE NAKED CULT OF HICKEY! People are always re-releasing their shit so go and buy some of it. I got the new 2x12" edition of "Various States of Disrepair" with all the extras, and I have already dry humped it twice, built a shrine to it, and stole it a baby; and that doesn't even scratch the surface of its potential.

"Life is cheap, but living is expensive." (DL)

"Wear something sexy and meet me at midnight."

[Originally, in this space, I had just listed every naughty word or phrase that I could come up with at two in the morning. It was a pretty long list. Then I realized that the spike in the amount of unwanted traffic/trolls my misanthropic little blahg would suddenly experience could be very annoying. So the dirty talk will just have to stay between me and the cat. This is a compilation of songs about horizontal action, or "doin' it." I like to talk about fucking and getting high, because if I am an expert at doing two things, it is fucking and getting high. Ok, maybe not an expert, per se. But, unlike Ian McKaye, "at least I fucking tried!" I already covered the subject of "Drugs" over at iLLcON, so here I am giving you, "Sex." Not literally, of course. That would not be enjoyable for either of us, seeing as how I finally got both my tentacle surgery, and my marsupial pouch (photos soon). As Burroughs said, "we see god through our assholes in the flashbulb of orgasm." Your girlfriend will hate this because it reminds her of how inadequate you are in the sack. Also, she will shave her head and grow her armpit hair. You're going to be eating hair pie, and that's if you're lucky. I still can't figure out how to get the tracks in the order I want, which pisses me off because I grew up in the age of actual "mixtapes." Lovingly crafted, handmade pieces of art, which were way more intimate and meaningful than this blogging business will ever get. You were gonna masturbate in twenty minutes anyway, why not let this compilation set the pace. I'm off to youjizz, myself, as soon as I finish these nachos. Love you. - RyGar]

download smut (DL)